A study in exertion, exhaustion, decay and the chance to breathe again. Made using a malfunctioning music box, unfinished oil painting, dead insects, and the slow destruction of a unedited poem. April 2018
To Perform
if I could fly
and feed
and only breathe cliffs
fly
feed
breathe
breathe
I would fill my lungs with dust if it meant I could fly
But it is light now and my wings are slick with dew
More and more these days I find myself cursing the sun
I wish to be the only visible light in the dark nights
Sleep deprivation is hideously thrilling
And I’ve never felt more in control
And my body is feeding adrenaline and it is devouring everything
I wish my work to be as scarlet as the mind
To have it breathe through me
Tearing its way out of my esophagus
There are only moments
They march single file along cliffs
Dropping
Falling down one by one
fill my lungs with dust if I fly
but light my wings with dew
and I curse the sun
I wish to be the dark nights
sleep is hideously
never in control
body is feeding and is devouring everything
I wish my scarlet mind
to breathe through me
tearing my esophagus
only moments
march single file along cliffs
one by one
It meant I could fly
slick with dew
cursing sun
in dark nights
deprivation
in control
devouring everything
scarlet as the mind
breathe through me
out of my esophagus
moments
falling down
fill lungs
with dew
cursing
only dark
deprivation
control
and adrenaline devouring everything
I wish
to breathe
Out
there
they
fall